hello.
found out today that zwan is playing at the museum of science and industry on jan. 27th for a record release party. how cool is that. you can learn about entropy, AND listen to zwan at the same time. well, i guess you could also do that if you brought a cd player to the museum with the zwan album, but... yeah. anyways, the only way to get in is to win tickets from q101, so that sucks.
also, the new zwan album "mary star of the sea" got leaked today. it comes out jan 28th i think. anyways, after listening to a few tracks, i feel its pretty damn good. billy corgan is the best songwriter. he has such a huge good song percentage.
oh yah, the big news of yesterday was the sox getting colon. personally im excited about the move, even though i never liked colon. but i am a huge optimist when it comes to sports. i guess its more fun than thinking your team is always gonna suck. i was also excited about cubs getting alou last year. anyways, having 2 of the best pitchers in the league is good. i guess chras and dudo arent impressed yet. if colon ends up being a bust, you can't blame kwilliams. better to do something than nothing. also, colon is in the last year of his contract anyways, so they wont be stuck with his fat ass.
oh yeah, cubs resigned my favorite player in baseball today, kerry wood, to a 1-yr deal. hopefully they can lock him up for a bunch more soon. ah, baseball. i can smell the dizudo league draft approaching. and another case race. hahaha.
ok laters.
posted by mcpheeny 12:49 AM
hi everyone.
paradorn lost. NOOOOO. the campaign for thai dominance in sports takes a minor step back. oh well, the australian open doesn't count anyways. we still got tamarine in the women's side, though. too bad she's gonna get crushed by serena after next round.
i used to write a lot of fake articles for my fantasy teams. like those jokey ones you see in the onion, except they are made up of mostly inside jokes that no one else gets. anyways, i'll write a little article for you all now. its gonna be more like an ESPN the magazine article, not like a newspaper article, which i normally do. hopefully its decent.
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TAKE IT TO THE 'HOUSE
DARIEN, IL- Sounds of men and women grunting filled the air, interrupted every so often by loud clanking of metal. The stench of sweat and body odor permeated throughout the large room. Scantily clad juice girls parade about as if they own the place, when in reality, they are thought of as "just juice girls". Welcome to Powerhouse Gym in Darien, part of the seamy underbelly of a town that is often thought of as "A nice place to live."
It seemed it would just be a normal day for everyone at the gym. That is, until Piya Poongb-----r, 22, entered through the door. He was outfitted in his customary workout gear: the black Wal-Mart hoody, and black Nike windpants, however his black cap was nowhere to be seen. ("I forgot it in my room," Poong------ explained later.) Aside from the normal excited chatter from all of the females usually heard when he steps into Powerhouse, nothing seemed different to the outsider. But inside of him, there was a different energy, an energy waiting to be unleashed. "I watched him walk the whole way from the entrace to the locker room," short-brown-haired juice girl said. "I didn't know something special was about to happen, he was just acting like his usual huge self."
After changing into his true workout clothes, Poong------ went to work on the treadmill. The treadmill is a very important part of Poong------'s regimen, however it could also be the most deceiving. He likens it to a starting pitcher warming up in the bullpen before a start. He could have great stuff in the 'pen, but when he gets into the game, sometimes it just isn't there, and vice-versa. Today, the treadmill session would give no indication that Poong------ would shock the world of fitness training.
It was time to step up to the bench press, the standard by which every man's strength is measured. A wise man once said "No one asks how much you curl, or how much you military press...it's 'How much do you bench?' " On this day, two other locals joined Poong------: Christopher Salaveria and Joseph Chen, both 22, and Poong------'s most trusted spotters. "We were just thinking this was gonna be another normal bench session," explained Salaveria.
"Fo' shizzle," added Chen.
Poong------ tore through his first three sets like Sean Harrington tore through every defense he's faced. On his 3rd set, Poongbunkor had done a plate, 25's, and 10's on each side (195 lbs.). Salaveria and Chen finished their sets, and waited for Poong------'s call. Then, the unthinkable happened.
Poongbunkor called for two plates on each side.
All of a sudden, everyone stopped what they were doing. The silence in the gym was deafening. All eyes were on Poong------. Was it true? Was he really gonna do 2 plates (225 lbs.)? "I knew this day would come sometime, but i didn't think it would be today. A 30 pound jump? Thats insane," gushed Salaveria afterwards.
"Thought my boy was schtraight trippin' when i herd dat'," said Chen. "But i knew brah' would bust that shizzle out schtraight P-donk-style, fo' sho' "
The plates were placed on the bar. Chen had the honor of spotting Poongbunkor this time. ("A moment I'll never forget," Chen said later.) Poong------ exhaled, then lifted the bar up, and readied it to be pressed. And he did. There was some struggle, but he did it once, then with help a second time. He had done it. The whole gym erupted with delerious jubilation afterwards. "I...am the greatest," exclaimed Poong------, Rickey Henderson style. "That dude got mad hugeness," said huge black guy. That basically summed up the sentiments of the crowd.
Fo shizzle.
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hahahahha, thanks for reading. i guess it was more of a cross between a newspaper article and an ESPN the magazine article. anyways, this article was based off a true story. i did do two plates for the first time ever a couple days ago. and chras said "nice" and dudo said "huge". the end. hopefully i can increase more. ok laters.
posted by mcpheeny 1:03 PM