MCPHEENYS LOG

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Thursday, August 19, 2004

 
FEAR AND LOATHING IN WAUKESHA

when the tv showed paul jammon stick his landing to his clutch high bar routine in all his tape-delayed glory, it was as if he stamped the switch that released the moral shackles of waukesha, wisconsin (even though it really happened 7 hours earlier). i could hear people screaming in ecstasy, fireworks going off, police sirens everywhere. dumpsters were set on fire, men and women ran naked in the streets. strangers were making out; girls with girls, boys with boys, it didn't matter. paul jammon has given the citizens of waukesha a reason for living. so i called up my 300 pound samoan buddy and planned a ride in my desert silver rsx-s for our adventure in waukesha. i picked him up, and popped the trunk for him to show him our supplies for the night. two bags of grass, seventy-five pellets of mescaline, five sheets of high-powered blotter acid, a salt shaker half-full of cocaine and a whole galaxy of multicolored uppers, downers, screamers, laughers.... a quart of tequila, a quart of rum, a case of Budweiser, a pint of raw ether and two dozen amyl's.

no, actually none of this happened because waukesha is a pretty boring place. the most exciting thing that happens to me here is when i put a solo cup of tabasco sauce in the chili i buy from the soup place. i was pissed because i found out that he won earlier today, which pretty much ruined the nbc coverage. why am i so well informed of events in the world.

laters




posted by mcpheeny 12:30 AM


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