MCPHEENYS LOG

Friday, July 11, 2003

 

i don't know why, but i think this sausage race controversy is one of the funniest things i have ever seen. it has a very surreal quality about it. ok, for those of you who don't know what i'm talking about, in milwaukee they have these sausage races where 4 people run around in huge sausage costumes (Italian Sausage, Polish Sausage, Bratwurst, and Hot Dog). a couple of days ago, a pittsburgh player (randall simon) in the dugout knocked over Italian Sausage with his bat as a joke. she fell, and took down Hot Dog with her. they both ended up with scraped knees. this story has gotten huge media coverage, and everytime i see a news item on this, i crack up. watching video of the thing cracks me up too. you see Italian Sausage and Hot Dog fall down, then Polish Sausage and Bratwurst turn around and see them on the ground. seeing the Polish Sausage kneel to help his comrade is funny. Polish is a standup sausage. the most hilarious part was that Bratwurst kept running, after glancing back for a second, and won the race. hahahah, what a bastard. and then Simon got arrested for disorderly conduct and fined $432 (i knew that off the top of my head). this has been the first time i've been obsessed about a news story. one of my things is that i get obsessed about things easily. bands, chicks, movies...but not usually news stories.

here's the AP article about the incident (click on the videos at the right for multimedia hilarity):

Sausagegate

there's so much unintentional comedy in this article, my head exploded reading it. one of the brewers' execs called simon's act "sickening". hahaha. he just knocked down Italian Sausage as a joke. not a good move, but he didn't mean anything by it. the thought that he was facing possible battery charges because of this is even more funny.

they also went to Italian Sausage's house and interviewed her. hilllarious. she's just a cute little 19 year old chick (in a nonsexual way), and some of the quotes from her are gold:

"From my point of view, it's crazy because I am not used to like being interviewed or anything. I'm like, 'I'm just a sausage guys."

"I saw the bat before I got to him. I thought he was just going to fake me out," said Block, who stands 5-foot-3. "I am real little and I didn't take the blow very well."

maybe im nuts. i don't know why this is so funny to me. but try stepping back and look at the story. all this hoopla from a SAUSAGE RACE. i think it's because sausages are inherently funny. here are some pictures:

the heinous act:

oh the humanity!

the most maligned athlete since OJ:

posted by mcpheeny 6:00 PM

Thursday, July 10, 2003

 
here is a joke i thought of:

who is michael jackson's favorite cub?

corey pat-a-son.

hahaha.

ok thats it.

let's have a ball and a biscuit, sugar.
posted by mcpheeny 9:17 PM

Tuesday, July 08, 2003

 
hello.

i'm listening to a webcast of the final pumpkins show right now. it's the first time the bootleg has been released to commonfolk. ah, brings back a lot of memories. 4+ hour concert...insane. i was ready to lie down afterwards. i like when you go to concerts that make you feel like you got your ass kicked...ok, maybe not. maybe im getting too old. i wish i started going to shows when i was younger. you're thirsty and hungry as hell, your back and legs are sore, you feel disgusting from all the sweat, your clodes are sticking to you...ahhh. but you still feel good because you saw a kick-ass concert. basically, the factors here are how intense the band is, which projects onto the crowd, and how long they play. also, you have to be on the floor, packed like sardines with all the other fans. here are my rankings of concerts that most kicked my ass (doesn't mean best concerts i've been to):

1. final pumpkins concert at metro (dec 2, 2001) --- 4+ hours, that's why
2. pumpkins show at canopy in champaign (march 2000) --- a thousand college kids packed into the canopy, with huge pumpkins sound filling it up = ass kicking
3. white stripes at aragon (last week) --- huge, huge intensity from the band
4. zwan at eagles ballroom in milwaukee (few months ago) -- because the crowd was full of dipshits, band was good too
5. lbc at canopy (may 2001(2)?)--- because i was up front and it was hot :-/ (not one of the greatest concerts i've seen)


i was all ready to put local h up there, but i've never messed with being in the floor, despite going to about 6 of their shows. local h shows probably have the most intense floor of any band i've seen. the zwan metro shows had a nice and tame crowd, so they're not up there. all the other concerts that i've seen, i wasn't on the floor for, or it was not crowded.


by the way, i think managing the cubs has finally pushed dusty baker over the edge. his postgame comments keep getting stranger and stranger. hilllarious.

ok laters.
posted by mcpheeny 11:47 PM